This is in honour of cricket’s latest flight flicking off spinner Saeed Ajmal who has been called for chucking his one that goes the other way.
If you’re a young kid with aspirations of playing for your country and tweaking the ball a bit, here is the 5 step plan on how to be an International offspinner.
Step 1:
Learn off spin, you don’t need to spin it sideways, but make sure you spin it enough that when it doesn’t spin it’s more noticeable than when it does.
Step 2:
Practice hitting the same spot outside off for hours on end. Learn flight, guile, drift, and all those other things Bishen Bedi likes.
Step 3:
Obtain a physical deformity in your arm. Get your older brother, that old dude you met from my space, or any school yard bully to beat your arm until you can’t straighten it. Under no circumstances should you ever be able to straighten your bowling arm. Ever.
Step 4:
Learn the Doosra, with your newly bent arm that should be pretty easy.
Step 5:
Now you know how to bowl off spin, you’ll need a thick skin for when you make the top level, so when you are practising your deliveries employ local kids to yell out chucker, cheat, and no ball.
That should be enough.
You are now ready to be an international off spinner.
Good luck.
You can find Jarrod at cricket with balls where he has a charity game for this years ashes.
